For most of us, the beginning of the semester comes with plenty of energy, motivation, and determination. We want to become better students, the kind who prepare consistently, never leave things to the last minute. We buy planners, sticky notes, and all sorts of study gadgets. We imagine ourselves sitting in the library, colourful leaves falling outside the window, an open book in front of us and a warm drink in hand. We see ourselves in a state of “flow,” playing the role of the “professional student” who has everything perfectly organised, enjoys studying, and looks just like those characters from TV shows and movies set, for example, in the halls of Oxford University. Sounds familiar?
But let’s be honest: reality tends to look a little different as the semester goes on. The leaves aren’t always so perfectly colourful, and the pumpkin spice latte gets cold pretty quickly. By the end of the semester, we often feel disappointed that we didn’t live up to our own ideals, sometimes even slightly romanticised ones. I’m not saying we shouldn’t head into the semester full of energy and a desire for change. I’d just wish for us to direct that energy into changes that come from within, from what makes sense to us, not from ideals shaped by Instagram feeds or movies.
Finding Your Style
So how do we deal with that urge to change everything and start fresh this time? My answer would be: experiment. But do it with curiosity. If I believe a certain activity might help me get through the semester better, great, let’s give it a try. But then let’s ask ourselves honestly: Does this fit me? Does this feel good? And let’s really answer that question authentically. We may be surprised at how often the answer is “no.” No, colour-coding my notes doesn’t excite me. No, I don’t get into a study flow, even with leaves falling outside. No, I don’t enjoy working out regularly or practising mindfulness. And that’s not a failure, quite the opposite. That’s the very moment we can start. Because it also means we’re getting to know ourselves better. So let’s dig deeper: What exactly about organisation annoys me? Why can’t I study right now, and under what conditions does it work better? What bothers me about exercising, is it the type of workout, the intensity, the environment, or the fact that I’m doing it alone? Does the mindfulness teacher’s voice irritate me, or is it simply not the right technique for me, maybe I need something more active? It is absolutely fine to not highlight, to have messy notes, to never feel that “study flow,” to choose Pilates over weightlifting, or progressive muscle relaxation or a walk in the woods instead of mindfulness. It’s not about living hedonistically and only doing what feels good. It’s simply about the fact that if we do find joy in meaningful activities, we are much more likely to stick with them and return to them regularly.
Fickle Motivation
When we start something new, the beginning of the semester is often when we feel most motivated. Motivation can be a great spark to get things moving but it also tends to vanish quickly or jump to something else entirely. And then we pause, think, and ask ourselves: Do I feel like it today? If that question comes up, chances are the authentic answer is “no.” So what then? Maybe it would be useful for all of us not to rely so heavily on motivation. Chances are, most of the time we won’t feel like studying, writing papers, or even exercising. But what if we stopped treating these things as a question of “if” and started treating them as a fact? For example, let’s say we decide to exercise twice a week (because of our sedentary lifestyle). We pick Mondays and Wednesdays. The strategy is not to ask ourselves every Monday and Wednesday morning whether we feel like it or whether it’s the right day to exercise; we just go. We don’t waste energy on the decision, because we’ve already made it once.
I realise that this level of self-regulation isn’t always easy. Still, I’m convinced it can make the process of small and big life changes much easier. And if we manage to build routines that repeat regularly at the same time, they’ll also support us in times when stress gets heavier. But that’s perhaps more a topic for the end of the semester…
I can’t end this without a question: So, what will it be this semester, a pumpkin spice latte, or a double espresso?